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Monday, October 10, 2011

Report Says Half of U.K. Plays Video Games, Other Half Has Lives

A recent report has found that roughly 62 million of the population in the United Kingdom actively play video games.  But curiously, the other half are reported to actually have lives.  Analysts suggest that this is a temporary anomaly, but forecast a possible crisis.

"The data shows that people residing in the U.K. still don't have way too much time on their hands and/or are getting out more," explains Jack Union, who filed the report.  "People are active, actually connecting with their families, and even holding down jobs, but I feel this is just a symptom of a growing virus among the populace."

Prime Minister David Cameron issued a directive this week focusing on the phenomenon.  "It's disheartening to say the least," he said, "and really awe-inspiring, terrifying, earth shaking, gut wrenching, bloody awful, disturbing, and horrendous, to say the most..."

Many education directors have instigated plans to include tutorials on the proper use of many consoles and console games, as well as smartphone games in the curriculum.  "We must not let this news deter our children from growing up to be well adjusted citizens who sit on their couches all day fragging their friends on Halo".

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