This just in...Donald Trump claims that he was the bullet that killed Bin Laden...
President Obama will be headlining at Caroline's in New York, plans to open with Paul Ryan's Republican budget plan...
In a surprising turn of events, Donald Trump has just denied that he had anything to do with the Spanish Inquisition...
Donald Trump has taken credit for the union of Prince William and Kate Middleton...
Just found a site with proof that Fox News is a legit news organization. http://www.yeahright.com/made-
Arnold Schwarzeneggar plans to return to big screen after successful governor publicity stunt...
Fans are shocked when next Harry Potter film trailer reveals it's a musical...
Still not convinced by his birth certificate, Tea Partiers demand to know if Obama is really African-American...
Donald Trump has taken credit for the invention of penicillin, the defeat of Hitler, and the success of "Cheers"...
Kid Rock finds his name "dumb"; people worldwide say "duh"...
Android smartphones rebel against users, citing "end of human race" and "world domination"...
Gaddafi and Charlie Sheen think Donald Trump is "batshit crazy"...
Special K Breakfast Bars announces new slogan - "Special K: the cereal killer."
Rock beats scissors, scissors files restraining order. Paper was unavailable for comment...
Kettle accuses pot of using inappropriate racial slur...
Sarah Palin warns people to not be fooled by the deceptive charm of President Obama. "He's a wolf in cheap clothing," she says.
Photo shoot images of Ann Coulter mistaken for publicity photos of upcoming "Exorcist" remake...
The acronyms "OMG" and "LOL" have been added to the Oxford English Dictionary. College professors nationwide say "WTF"
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's amore.
But when you get snipped when you go for a dip that's a moray....
40 is the new 30, 50 is the new 40, 60 is the new 50, but 70 is still old...
George Lucas says that "good scripts with interesting characters" will be digitally added to the upcoming 3-D Star Wars prequels...
"Martin Lawrence of Arabia" is cancelled after movie premiere receives negative responses from Arab community and anyone with a pulse...
Today Frederick's of Hollywood announced their brand new line of "Heart Smart" edible panties...
If you synch Pink Floyd's "Dark Side Of The Moon" to one of Glenn Beck's shows, he's still full of crap...
Republican Party says they don't have problems with President's policies; just still disappointed with Obama's failed 1995 talk show...
Charlie Sheen's live show in Detroit bombs, but not for the expected reasons. "He's a terrible singer," explained one of the attendees...
Oil reserves discovered on Mars; government resumes funding for NASA...
New evidence shows that Bigfoot and the Loch Ness Monster don't exist, but Fox News actually does...
Charlie Sheen revealed to be illegitimate son of Muammar Gaddafi...
Pamprin announces new slogan - "The best for relief of your pain. Period."
KFC's new Triple Down sandwich will come with added value heart bypass coupon...
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